25 years ago today

It was the eve of Carl’s and my wedding day, and I was feeling both excited and trepidatious! I remember thinking to myself, as a 25-year-old, that I was about to make the biggest commitment of my life thus far. Was I ready to say yes to more decades than I had yet lived with one person?

Of course, the answer was yes. It was a bit of a case of jumping in the deep end, but I had Carl to jump in with me, and I was excited for all that we had to look forward to. July 18th, 1998, was a magical day, followed by many more. I can honestly say that there has not been a day when I have, even for a moment, regretted having married Carl.

Our vows were traditional Anglican ones. We promised to love each other in sickness and health, through good times and bad, and all that jazz. We said it because we meant it. But nothing could have prepared us for what we would go through together 23 years later.

I sometimes wonder whether, if we had known what we were in for, we might have chosen a different path. Perhaps if we had known we would lose Charlie, we might have chosen not to have a second child. But we couldn't have know and thus we were blessed with the most wonderful, sunny child we could ever have wished for. And then one day she was gone.

I honestly can say that there is no one I would rather have gone through hell with than Carl. And through hell, we truly have gone together. If anything, it has made us even closer. There is nothing we will ever have to survive that could be worse than losing Charlie.

So here’s to 25 years and 25 more. I look forward to celebrating 50 years, just as my amazing parents did a few years ago and Carl’s loving parents did more than a decade ago.

Love you forever, Carl.